Reply from Jeffrey, Child's Age 12 and 14 - 8/17/01 - IP#: 131.96.240.23Steven, Thanks for taking the time to write a very thoughtful and thorough message. I hope many parents will check the 11-20 board and read it, because as you say, it is easy for parents of bedwetters to make an already difficult situation worse for their kids. I don't think most parents do it maliciously, but they may not think ahead about the consequences of their actions. Bladder control problems are very common in my family background. I have been a bedwetter all my life, and both of my sons are also nightly bedwetters. My youngest son does not yet have daytime control, which is not surprising because I didn't either until I was 13, and even then just barely. So I understand what my sons have to put up with. I was glad to hear you say that you didn't have any trouble in scouts and camping, because you had four good friends who stood by you. That can make all the difference in the world. Both of my boys are Scouts, and both love to camp. They, too, have friends who know they wet, and who are understanding and supportive. I think the percentage of other kids who are capable of being sympathetic is higher than a lot a people realize. It always saddens me when bedwetters your age or younger are so terrified of having anyone find out that they isolate themselves from potential friends. They won't spend the night at other houses or invite even a close friend to stay overnight with them, and they won't join scouts or go to church summer camp, etc. In many cases, these teenagers and children are depriving themselves of experiences they would enjoy. Thanks, also, for emphasizing how distasteful it is to have to wake up in a cold wet smelly bed. I had to do that when I was growing up. My sons think of their diapers as just a tool to make something possible (a dry bed) that they cannot do on their own without the help of protective wear. My wife and I decided years ago not to hide from them the fact that I wear them too. Sorry about your accident with the lawnmower. I wish you well, and thanks again for your refreshing perspective. Jeffrey |